Totally alone holding my green so-called "political" book ....white sand all around, I stood watching my shadow on my right, and remembered how I learned estimating the time using shadows when I was 10 years old....ya3ny 10 years ago, a number I would have never been able to estimate correctly if I didn't know how old I was then.
The waves were moving one after each other, they reminded me of us, and how a person can be pushed by another person OUTSIDE, but he always gets back to his original place very soon, nothing stays outside except useless sea foam.
Feeling that golden ray warming me although it was very cold and just stopped raining a couple of hours ago, I held my head up to the sky after I had just finished praying for all those who asked and who didn't ask me to :D (The list is gowning longer w msh hayenfa3 keda 3ala fekra!! :D). I kept watching the sea gulls flying up high in groups, one of seagull was flying alone, in a direction opposite to the others', I wished I was able to call out: Enty ya benty ray7a fein?! Ma kollohom mashyeen keda....hatouhy! Then I started thinking, maybe that one was the only right one, or maybe it just wanted to explore the horizon, or maybe it was flying to a place no one else can see. It was my first time to see sea gulls flying that high, I've always known that they fly near the water surface to grab fish and eat, but sometimes we break expectations and move from the circle of the "known" heading to the "unknown" sometimes just feel our freedom and sometimes heading to places or action no one can see or know but us.
Fishing boats were moving everywhere, but that time they're rowing to a well known place and for a well known purpose...among those "sail-less" boats, one boat with a yellow sail was approaching, I remembered when I was out with my friends once and one of them asked us to close our eyes and imagine ourselves in a place (Fakra ya Enas? :D)....I imagined myself then watching a boat with a big sail....maybe because I love boats monzo el tofoola :D and because I when I was a child I wished I was a boy so I can go rowing in a wooden boat (aw a "woody" boat ya Aya :D:D).
I felt like I had a running stream of memories moving much faster than the running motor boats on the other side...and like I had a flowing uncontrollable sea with many waves of emotions inside my heart, I started thinking why the hell do we feel nostalgic? Why do we ever feel like :"zaman kan a7san", and why do we wish sometimes like we want to be back to the past while every single moment in the present is going to be "the future's past" and we're going to miss them then, and we'll feel then like we want to live those moments again, but all in vain, so why not enjoy them now and then enjoy them as memories w yeb2a keda 5adna el combo w kesebna 2 f wa7ed :D
It took me a couple of hours being lost in my own head, and the golden ray was gone then a running dog started barking that I couldn't hear "Fayrouz" singing anymore (she was singing, m3a en makansh fi 7ad 3al ba7r 3'ery, hamout w a3raf el sowt gaie menein!) so I decided to get back to reading w kefaya sho3'l el maganeen da. :D
Ah! Kont hansa a2ool aham 7aga!! The boat with the yellow sail was holding a message....kan maktoub 3aleiha: El 7amdulillah 3al yemeen....wel rezk 3ala Allah 3al shemal :):)
El 7amdulillah 3ala pur past...wel rezk 3ala Allah in our future.
